2. When the turtles of Turtle Den came across Toni’s abandoned shell they were up in arms with amusement. One turtle declared that it was better off Toni was gone; as to prevent them from becoming sick from seeing poor Toni’s face. Toni! Shelly the Turtle God declared it national Toni Day to celebrate the death of hideous Toni. Everyone celebrated until they could no longer walk. Turtle wine was very potent, in great abundance on this day, and turtles were slow as it was, although they beat rabbits sometimes, turtles were still pretty slow. Turtles were really intoxicated on this day.
Call it being in the right place at the right time. Fredrick Fox stumbled into Turtle Den the day after Toni Day. Fredrick Fox was in a candy shop. Fredrick Fox was still hungry because he had not eaten anything, before Toni, in a month. Fredrick had been drinking water from streams and creeks that ran between the hills. Fredrick was emaciated, but hydrated and ready to eat.
Fortunately for Fredrick Fox everyone in Turtle Den was passed out in a drunken stupor; turtle wines and mead were in heavy use on such a day of celebration, Toni Day. Fredrick sucked it up and started devising a plan to kill and eat as many turtles as possible, however sick it may be. He Found a rock and smashed one, two, three turtles on the head, and then he started eating. Fredrick’s claws, from lack of use were extremely sharp, he would slice and dice turtle meat:
Fredrick Fox ate turtle raw, Fredrick Fox ate turtle-stew; Fredrick Fox ate so much turtle flesh he thought he might spew.
Turtles do not love. Turtles do not have fun. Turtles were only made to work hard and learn more stuff these turtles needed proof of everything. Experience did not matter as much as paper acknowledgements of what you have learned. A four-year degree is what god thought you should have, or rather Shelly the turtle god. That is why Fredrick could eat turtles, he thought. He knew how turtles wasted their lives chasing dreams and hopes of society and forgetting their own. Fredrick Fox was again saving them. Fredrick Fox was not starving on accident he needed to find a prey that wasted its day with unimportant titles and false accomplishments: a worthy victim. Fredrick fell in love with the taste of turtles more than the taste of rabbits. (He also found out that rabbits spent their days mating and lounging in the grass-Fredrick Fox could appreciate this.) Fredrick Fox liked fornication and mental stimulation to beat it. Fredrick Fox rather liked the rabbit’s ideals. Fredrick Fox had a rather large smile.
Fredrick Fox now loved turtles and didn’t think so much about rabbits. He drank the fine turtle wines and ate tender turtle meat-He had forgot about his problems for the moment, and all the living turtles continued to sleep.